I ride alone but it never felt lonely anymore.

“There’s nothing more freeing and empowering than liking your own company.”

Almost everybody in their quarter life has a fast-paced lifestyle. No me-time, no time for this and that, schedule’s too crowded, always on the go, fast food sometimes is the best choice for meals, no time to be alone and at peace. I don’t know about you but i really value my solitude, a time for me, myself and I. I feed my soul by reading books (esp. Elizabeth Gilbert’s), I cherish the quiet times away from traffic noise and pollution but sometimes, due to external factors such as work, school, different occasions/holidays, paper works and errands, I slowly lost my inner peace. I noticed that I am slowly becoming a robot that do nothing except going with my everyday routine. I did not had enough time for my self. My thoughts are becoming meaningless. That was my problem until one night came and I rode the subway as i go home. Nothing uncanny or special happened. It is my same world of mundane every single day. But at that night as I go home from work, I suddenly wanted something new that could happen right away. I craved for a change. So, when I rode the subway, I tried to sit on the floor. Nothing special eh? People always do that. But for me, that was so special because it was my first time to do that and it was a little bit awkward for me ’cause I am not used to sit like that in public places. But I did. To satisfy the cravings of change I had within me.

“If you look to others for fulfillment, you will never be truly fulfilled.”

My subway ride usually takes 15 minutes from home to work and 30 minutes from home to school. I never thought that I spend to much time in commuting. As I sat on the train floor, first thing that i felt was a great relief. After a long tiring day, I got a chance to relax. I realized it is more comfortable to sit on the floor than on a chair inside the train. I don’t have to mind other people’s elbows bumping on mine. I don’t have to pretend that I am sleeping just because sometimes it makes me feel awkward sitting in their with other people’s face right in front of my face. I don’t have to sit up straight and avoid getting too much space because other people beside me might feel uncomfortable. I suddenly felt I don’t need to worry about other people. I sat in the floor, relaxed, feet crossed and minding my own business. I read a blog post about Zaha Hadid and her works (Godbless her soul). I drank my cup of coffee, listened to my earphones. And then I caught myself daydreaming. It is funny because I am a loud,talkative,outgoing person but I really enjoy being alone. For the first time, I never have to worry about other people anymore. I realized, this is a perfect way of having my long time craving, my “me-time”. As I walked on my way home, I had a fulfilling sigh.. I am thankful for that subway ride because I felt complete and had a grip on “me” again after a long time.

True and lasting inner peace can never be found in external things. It can ONLY be found within. And then once we find and nurture it with ourselves, it radiates outward.

– Buddha

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